Tuesday 20 April 2010

New Icelandic-like Cash Clouds Detected Over Westmonster

The recent volcanic like Cash Cloud eruptions that have devastated the Icelandic economy are now thought to be affecting the cosy south-east village of Westmonster.

Elliot Morley, a Westmonster resident and local expenses-herder of some repute, was reported by expert cash investigators at Southwark Crown Court as having witnessed large amounts of cash which is known as "Legalaid" in his local dialect.

Researchers encountered other local residents, David Chaytor and Jim Devine, who are thought to have told lawyers that they also saw large "legalaid" cash clouds. Some readers may know of these phenomena by other names like "taxpayers' cash" or "my b****y money, you thieving ba*****s".

The testimony of these locals is in some doubt as they are also known to have made eccentric claims of expenses-abduction in the past. This has become quite a common occurrence in the Parliament area of Westmonster where local ignorant windbags claim to have seen mysterious phantom mortgages, toilet seats, porn films or even moats and then make exraordinary expense-abduction claims.

Cash clouds have caused huge disruption to political fellow-travellers in the past as many flights of fancy get cancelled in such conditions at Westmonster. Those worse affected include local gang-masters Gordon "Boom 'n Bust" Brown, Dave "Cast-Iron" Cameron and Nicholas "Who?" Clegg. They have had to cancel many flights of fancy as the destructive side effects of the cash clouds, known to experts as "public opinion", revealed the weaknesses of their political vehicles.

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